Changes

     Something really big happened to me today.   I got a promotion.  Not just a "You did great on your evaluation, so here's a raise" type promotion, but a legitimate different position type of promotion.  As in a Manager.  (Why did I automatically think of someone being a McDonald's manager when I typed that????....no offense to McDonald's managers of course.)  I am now THE Recreation Therapy Manager of the Health Services side of the retirement community I work at.  That means I'll be managing 5 people as well as being responsible for the leisure interests of 60 residents in Health Care, 40 in Assisted Living and 23 on our dementia unit.  Yikes.

     SHHHH.  Let's keep it between us.  It won't be officially announced until later next week. 

     So how did I get here?  What a great question...I'm so glad you asked.  I'll save you from the boring work related details of how this position came to be...but in short, my boss (most amazing woman ever) took a higher position herself (as in Wellness and Leisure Manager of the entire building.....add about 5 more staff members and 400+ Independent Living residents)...so the position of Recreation Therapy Manager became open.  And there it has been...open and available since late October; the perfect qualified candidate never applying. 

    Last week my boss and I had a heart to heart and in a moment of clarity desperation my boss made the statement that still rings in my ears.... "So you aren't interested in the position?"

    Well, crap. 

     Honestly?  No, I hadn't been.  I like my comfortable routine.  I like knowing how my day is going to play to out.  I like my office and my limited job responsibilities.  I like clocking out right at 5 and not thinking about work until I walk back in the next morning at 8:30. 

     But once those words were spoken there was no turning back.  Because I knew.  If my boss believed I could handle it, so did I.  So I formally applied, sat for an interview, and viola!  Got the job practically handed to me. 

      Please don't get me wrong.  I am soooooo grateful for this amazing opportunity, especially in the job market of today.  I can't believe I'm someone who actually is getting a pay raise.  I'm so excited to conquer the challenges ahead, to learn and grow and teach those who come after me.  So I really should be absolutely thrilled right?  WRONG.

     It took me a few days to find the root of my hesitancy towards accepting this was actually going to be my new job position.  Was it the new job responsibilities? no.  Was it ALL of the new job responsibilites? No.  Was it the simple fact that things are changing?  no.

     And then it hit me.  My professional life has advanced faster than my personal life. 

     Sure some women work for years and years and get promotion after promotion and grow professionally before they even meet a man.  That's their life story.

     But for me? Professional development was never even on my radar.  I knew the course my life was going to go and up until 3 years ago I never even had to stop and ask for directions.  My soulmate magically, serendipitously, by the grace of God entered my life at exactly the right time and I knew children would soon follow.

    I figured I would get a job (in my field) until the baby making began.  I would be a stay at home mom (okay...let's be realistic....a part-time working-stay at home mom).  I would babysit other people's children....you know, for people who actually cared about their careers that they actually needed other people to watch their sweet babies.

    But here I am.  Advancing in my line of work.  Obtaining a higher rank which was practically dropped in my lap.  I know I am so, so, so blessed to have this opportunity.  The pay increase will help us pay off our debt a little sooner and may even get us to our next treatment sooner.

    Knowing how blessed I am though, doesn't take the sting away.  The sting that while my career is growing, a baby inside me is not.